There are a bizarre number of players managed by Sir Alex Ferguson at Manchester United who have failed to cover themselves in glory in management and in the punditry game since retiring, which makes us wonder why one of the best managers in football history has not been able to influence nearly enough impressive football brains, whether that be in the dug-out or on our television screens.
Thank you for reading this post, don't forget to subscribe!We’d go further and say the majority of Sir Alex’s former players who have stayed in football are pretty bloody unbearable. Many show a lack of knowledge but are being paid a hell of a lot to speak about football in front of people who pay too much money to listen.
With that in mind, we have ranked the Manchester United media mafia by how unbearable they are.
10) Roy Keane
Does not bother wasting any energy trying to get bites. Says it how it is. Is not afraid to make enemies. We wish more Manchester United legends could be like Keano.
9) Gary Neville
Mildly irritating but deserves praise for repeatedly calling out the Glazers, even if he didn’t care when he was being paid by them and diverts blame when it doesn’t seem relevant.
Neville’s ability to wind up rival fans (particularly Arsenal) is also impressive. Overall, he knows his stuff and is a brilliant co-commentator. Also, Tories hate him. That’s a bonus.
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8) Andy Cole
Was one of the first people to call out Antony for being a spinning flop. Doesn’t say too much but when he does, it rarely makes you think ‘what an attention-seeking moron’, which is an improvement on some on this list.
7) Owen Hargreaves
Mundane is the word that suits Hargreaves and his punditry the best. Isn’t exactly bad at the job but his insight leaves a lot to be desired and probably puts a few people to sleep every time he is on TNT Sports.
6) Paul Parker
His opinions would be completely unbearable if he wasn’t amazing for our traffic. Parker chats an awful lot of rubbish but we give him the benefit of the doubt because it has helped us through many dry days.
He was also one of the first to call out Marcus Rashford, though his language often leaves a lot to be desired. Sh*tting on his doorstep, Paul? Really?
5) Patrice Evra
His raw chicken love-making has not inspired us here, we promise. Evra’s finest punditry moment undoubtedly came when he threw Thierry Henry under the bus by revealing that the Arsenal legend turned the TV off when he saw Granit Xhaka leading the Gunners out as captain. It was difficult, yet brilliant, to watch.
In fairness to Evra, he clearly does not give a sod about what he says live on air. Doesn’t stop him from being annoying, mind.
4) Dion Dublin
A bit of a nightmare to listen to when he is on co-commentary duty and isn’t really known for being a Manchester United pundit if truth be told. His ties with the club and the fact he is frequently seen or heard on our televisions sees him sit near the middle of the road. Homes Under the Hammer and his impeccable ability to identify the bathroom at the top of the stairs score him some points.
3) Dwight Yorke
Needs to realise that he can’t get a job in management because he is a rubbish manager. His punditry game isn’t much better, either. There is a reason we don’t see him on our screens much.
2) Michael Owen
Like Evra, Owen is simply a bizarre human being. From throwing the remains of his apple into a bin that is strangely situated next to his TV in his front room to hating films, never trying tea or coffee and being a hilariously bad actor, the former Manchester United, Liverpool and England striker is an oddball, but we wouldn’t change him for the world.
That side of his personality amuses us, but he rarely amuses us with his takes on TNT Sports or Premier League Productions. His bias tends to shine through when jumping to the defence of his pal Howard Webb – who he refuses to challenge on ‘Match Officials: Mic’d Up‘ – on social media.
1) Rio Ferdinand
The word ‘unbearable’ in the punditry dictionary should be illustrated with a picture of Rio Ferdinand.
His TNT Sports gig gives him the platform to cast his lack of wisdom to a more generic football audience but it is on YouTube that Ferdinand is able to show his true self and get reactions on social media. From saying that Mikel Arteta would jump at the chance to replace Erik ten Hag at Manchester United on his Five channel to backing his former club to finish in the top four on live television, he can be equally deluded and biased on both platforms.
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